| A Time to Live Surviving Suicidal Thoughts |
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A Message for Family and Friends*
*Abridged from A Time to Live: Surviving Suicidal Thoughts by Kimberly Andry
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| “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV |
… for Family and Friends
A Time to Live: Surviving Suicidal Thoughts is provides crisis coping strategies and long-term healing
strategies for people with recurrent suicidal thoughts. As a family member or friend of a sufferer, you will
gain useful insights in regards to what a loved one is experiencing. You may even wish to become that
one supportive person your loved one desperately needs.
I have found that people who have never experienced serious thoughts of suicide are typically unable to
relate to the viewpoint of someone who experiences suicidal ideation. With this in mind, I urge you to stay
focused on your loved one’s life-threatening condition so that you do not become bogged down in your
own perceptions.
While in counseling dealing with numerous past emotional wounds, I began seriously seeking away to
better cope with my own suicidal ideation. I was very fearful those thoughts would eventually result in my
death. After continuously seeking methods of coping, I eventually found a combination of elements to be
effective in helping me deal with crisis moments.
For me, a crisis moment is when something has happened in my world that brings the suicidal thoughts
strongly to the forefront of my mind. Sometimes the thoughts pass quickly and without much
consequence. At other times, the thoughts are very strong and deeply disturbing. These life-threatening
feelings began when I was in my early teens, and I have never actively sought them out. They are just
there.
Please know that your loved one does not want to have thoughts of suicide. Your loved one does not want
to die. Your loved one is experiencing a tremendous sense of hopelessness and unrelenting emotional
pain. There is most likely clinical depression or some other treatable disorder in play. The recurrent
thoughts are merely a symptom of a larger problem. Unfortunately, it is a symptom that can prove fatal if
the underlying cause is not treated.
Your loved one is most likely afraid to speak openly to you about how he or she is feeling. Your loved one
fears your judgement, your ridicule and your misunderstanding. These reactions will make someone with
suicidal thoughts feel even more hopeless and isolated. It is critical that people with these recurrent
thoughts have at least one person with whom to speak openly about their feelings. Many times, just
talking about these feelings in a non-judgmental and empathetic environment will help diffuse a life-
threatening situation.
Your loved one has much work ahead in terms of dealing with the underlying problem. The thoughts, most
likely, will not just suddenly stop. It will take time. Until the underlying cause has been effectively resolved,
you can help your loved one through crisis moments. You do not need an understanding of how someone
can have these suicidal thoughts; you just need to have a listening and supportive ear.
A Time to Live: Surviving Suicidal Thoughts is provides crisis coping strategies and long-term healing
strategies for people with recurrent suicidal thoughts. As a family member or friend of a sufferer, you will
gain useful insights in regards to what a loved one is experiencing. You may even wish to become that
one supportive person your loved one desperately needs.
I have found that people who have never experienced serious thoughts of suicide are typically unable to
relate to the viewpoint of someone who experiences suicidal ideation. With this in mind, I urge you to stay
focused on your loved one’s life-threatening condition so that you do not become bogged down in your
own perceptions.
While in counseling dealing with numerous past emotional wounds, I began seriously seeking away to
better cope with my own suicidal ideation. I was very fearful those thoughts would eventually result in my
death. After continuously seeking methods of coping, I eventually found a combination of elements to be
effective in helping me deal with crisis moments.
For me, a crisis moment is when something has happened in my world that brings the suicidal thoughts
strongly to the forefront of my mind. Sometimes the thoughts pass quickly and without much
consequence. At other times, the thoughts are very strong and deeply disturbing. These life-threatening
feelings began when I was in my early teens, and I have never actively sought them out. They are just
there.
Please know that your loved one does not want to have thoughts of suicide. Your loved one does not want
to die. Your loved one is experiencing a tremendous sense of hopelessness and unrelenting emotional
pain. There is most likely clinical depression or some other treatable disorder in play. The recurrent
thoughts are merely a symptom of a larger problem. Unfortunately, it is a symptom that can prove fatal if
the underlying cause is not treated.
Your loved one is most likely afraid to speak openly to you about how he or she is feeling. Your loved one
fears your judgement, your ridicule and your misunderstanding. These reactions will make someone with
suicidal thoughts feel even more hopeless and isolated. It is critical that people with these recurrent
thoughts have at least one person with whom to speak openly about their feelings. Many times, just
talking about these feelings in a non-judgmental and empathetic environment will help diffuse a life-
threatening situation.
Your loved one has much work ahead in terms of dealing with the underlying problem. The thoughts, most
likely, will not just suddenly stop. It will take time. Until the underlying cause has been effectively resolved,
you can help your loved one through crisis moments. You do not need an understanding of how someone
can have these suicidal thoughts; you just need to have a listening and supportive ear.